Hood in the Wood

Once upon a time, there was a little girl who lived in a village near the Sherwood forest. Whenever, she went out, the little girl wore a red riding cloak, so everyone in the village called her Little Red Riding Hood.

One morning, Little Red Riding Hood asked her mother if she could go to visit her grandmother as it had been a while since they'd seen each other.

"That's a good idea," her mother said. So they packed a nice basket for Little Red Riding Hood to take to her grandmother.

Remember, go straight to Grandma's house," her mother cautioned. "Don't dawdle along the way and please don't talk to strangers! The forest is dangerous. There could be thieves and outlaws or worse, wolves, just waiting for a little girl like you. "

"Don't worry, mommy," said Little Red Riding Hood, "I'll be careful."

And so the little girl left the village for a not-so-long journey towards her Grandma's house.

A few hours later, Red Riding Hood knocked on the door of her Grandma's house.

"Who is it?" said a deep voice.

"It's me, Little Red Riding Hood."

"Oh, how lovely! Do come in, my dear," said the deep voice.

When Little Red Riding Hood entered the little cottage, she saw that her Grandma was still in bed and had covered her face with the bed sheets.

"Grandmother! Your voice sounds so odd. Is something the matter?" she asked.

"Oh, I just have touch of a cold," squeaked a voice from under the bed sheets.

"Grandma, are you sure you are OK? You seemed to have put on a lot of weight.", said Little Red Riding Hood, looking at the huge pile under the bed sheets, which she thought was her grandmother.

"I am OK, dear," said a hoarse voice quite unlike the first voice.

"Come out of your bed sheets, Grandma, or I will leave. I came here to see you and you don’t seem to be wanting to meet me at all." said the little girl.

And to Little Red Riding Hood's shock, two men leaped out of the bed.

"Hi there little girl, I am Lincoln Greened Robin Hood. Scared you, didn’t we?" said the first man.

"And I am Little John of Sherwood, Little Red Riding Hood." said the other who was taller than the first one by a foot.

"Are you going to eat me now?" asked Little Red Riding Hood.

"No, little girl, we are here to protect you from a wolf who, according to sources, plans to eat you." said the man who called himself Robin Hood.

"The source being my dear friend, Will Stutely the rude." said Little John of Sherwood.

"No, no, you are making a big mistake. The wolf is supposed to come here and eat me. That’s how the story is supposed to be.” said Little Red Riding Hood.

“No, dear girl. This is a modified version of that old story. After hours of begging, did we get these roles. We can’t just let that dirty wolf of the wood gobble you up. The wolf will be killed and we will take you back to your mom.” said Lincoln Greened Robin Hood.

Bang! There was a soft knock on the door and the next moment the door fell in. And as expected, there barged in a big dirty wolf.

“Sorry, I am late.“ said the hungry beast to Little Red Riding Hood. Then his gaze fell on the two sturdy men in the room. “And who the hell are you and what are you doing here?” he asked.

“I am not sure if you were informed, but there is a small change in the story. We are Robin Hood and Little John of the Wood and we are here to protect Little Red Riding Hood from you, dirty wolf.” said Robin.

“Well, that’s just unacceptable. You see, I am really hungry and I was under the impression that I will be allowed to eat this little girl. Now you tell me that’s not how all this is supposed to go. I will eat both of you as well.” said dirty wolf of the wood and he pounced on the two men.

“Hold on, dirty wolf! I have got an idea. You can eat that stupid woodcutter outside and we will take the girl with us. Is that alright?” said Little John of Sherwood.

The wolf thought for a moment and said, “Yeah, I think it’s a good idea. Ok, I’ll be leaving then. See you sometime later in another grandmother’s house. Let me take care of that woodcutter now”

Little did the wolf know that woodcutters are quite unlike woodpeckers. They carry an axe with them most of the time. And when he went outside the cottage, standing there was this woodcutter with his sharp axe. There was a howl, a scream and a thud and the next moment everything went quiet.

Meanwhile, inside the cottage, the two outlaws were celebrating their triumph over the wolf.

“Took proper care of that dirty wolf, didn’t we?”

“Yeah, I didn’t even have to use my crossbow.”

“Wait a sec. Where is the girl?”

“Oh God. She isn’t here. What are we going to do now?”

“Let’s go out and search for the girl.”

The two men came out of the cottage and saw that there were footsteps leaving the cottage. Understanding that the girl had gone in that direction, they followed the footsteps.

After hours of walking, the two outlaws reached another cottage which was so big that twenty wolves could be staying there. They knocked on the door and waited for a response from whoever was inside.

The door opened and the men walked in, to see what they least expected.

To their horror, the room was full of wolves. They were about a dozen wolves inside sitting around a dining table gaping hungrily at them. And there she was, Little Red Riding Hood in the center, staring at those two as well.

“What in the god’s name is going on here? Am I dreaming?” said Little John of Sherwood.

“No, you are awake, big beef. And you better prepare yourself to be eaten raw by wolves.” said Little Red Riding Hood.

“How can this be possible? Are we seeing the girl we saved from a dirty wolf in association with a family of wolves?” squeaked Robin Hood the brave.

Little Red Riding Hood looked at them and said,

“Neither am I little, nor am I red. I am in fact a werewolf. And what you see here is my family. They are all my siblings and pure wolves. I am the only one gifted here, the lone werewolf. The wolf you got killed today by the woodcutter was a wolf we all despised, for he was quite unlike we are. We asked him to join us but he refused. So our next step was to get him killed. And there you were, ready to help anyone who needed help.
I was sure that you would get rid of that wolf for me.
But you weren’t brave enough to kill the wolf yourself. You got him killed by the woodcutter. It doesn’t matter anyway. At the end of the day, we have our enemy killed and tasty dinner at home.”

And then, she froze up all of a sudden and within a second, turned into a wolf.

Next moment, there were howls, screams, thuds and then everything went quiet.